


The Phantom Squeak

by AbigailMoment



Category: Persona 5
Genre: Adorable Mice, Spoilers, Weird Status Ailments
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-12
Updated: 2020-09-07
Packaged: 2021-03-05 22:07:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 5,600
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25862548
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AbigailMoment/pseuds/AbigailMoment
Summary: While exploring Shido's castle, the Phantom Thieves are turned into mice.When they emerge back into the physical world, Joker doesn't turn back.Makoto is concerned. Ann wants to dress him up with tiny hats.
Relationships: Kitagawa Yusuke & Kurusu Akira, Kurusu Akira & Niijima Makoto, Kurusu Akira & Okumura Haru, Kurusu Akira & Phantom Thieves of Hearts, Kurusu Akira & Sakamoto Ryuji, Kurusu Akira & Sakura Futaba, Kurusu Akira & Takamaki Ann
Comments: 20
Kudos: 214





	1. The Incident

"He's. So. TINY."

Usually, status ailments faded by the end of the battle. Rage passed into calm. Depression lightened. Bewilderment cleared. When the frantic pace of combat ebbed, there were teammates to reorient you and lead you back to an even keel.

"Don't squeeze him, Futaba!"

The other Phantom Thieves were understandably concerned about the persistence of this particular effect, but Queen reasonably guessed that it would go away when they all returned to the physical world. Which they had to do right now--Joker couldn't exactly give orders in this state.

Queen was, unfortunately, mistaken.

"But he's so TINY!" exclaimed Futaba. "When I was watching you through the screen I didn't realize how TINY you were!"

And now all of them were all crouched around Futaba, half out of concern, half out of a tactical desire to keep the late night crowd still scattered around the Diet building from noticing that Futaba was holding a mouse the size of a dachshund. A mouse with a tiny white domino mask.

The mouse, for his part, was enduring Futaba's aggressive cuddles with mellow grace. This wasn't too surprising. Joker endured most things with mellow grace. It offered a balancing counterpoint to, for example, Ryuji, who was currently freaking out.

"What the HELL!" he yelled. "I mean what the hell? This isn't how anything works!"

"It does run counter to what we've experienced of the Metaverse so far," Makoto agreed, more calmly, but still very concerned. She looked down at Morgana, who was the most likely to understand what was going on.

Morgana was perched with his front paws on Futaba's thigh, looking up at the masked-mouse. It was hard to read Morgana's cat-face, but he seemed confused and upset.

"I mean. It's weird to say this, but Ryuji's right," he said. "This shouldn't happen. Cognitive effects shouldn't persist in the physical world. That's why Treasures have different forms when we retrieve them."

"Perhaps something about Shido's palace is changing the rules," offered Yusuke.

"Maybe," Morgana said uncertainly. "Joker?"

Futaba accommodatingly crouched down so that the cat and the mouse were on level.

Joker was covered in gray fur, with dark whiskers and tiny round ears. He was about as large as Morgana. His domino mask was still perched on his face, held in place by whatever aesthetically-minded-magic powered Personas and invented their outfits. It was weird how the mask hung on with no latch or lace, but the durability of that particular cantrip paled in comparison to the mystery of why he was still like this at all.

Morgana examined the Phantom-Thief-Leader-turned-rodent, as if he could learn more if he stared hard enough. After a moment, Joker tilted his head forward, tapping his whiskered nose against Morgana's and startling the cat.

"Ack!" said Morgana.

Futaba cackled. "You got booped."

There was the clicking noise of a digital camera shutter as Ann snapped a photo of them with her phone.

"Ann!" Makoto exclaimed. She felt like people weren't taking this seriously.

"Sorry! They're just really, REALLY cute. Look!"

She showed around the photo of Joker and Morgana. Yusuke hummed critically.

"While the content is certainly charming, the composition is off."

"Then you take one!" Ann countered, thrusting her phone into his hand.

"We are trying to save Japan," Makoto tried to remind someone.

"I think we were pretty much done for the night, anyway," Haru said consolingly. "We got quite far!"

"That's true," Makoto allowed. "But we don't know how to fix...this."

She gestured to what was happening in front of her. It was unclear whether she was referring to the particular problem of Joker being a mouse, or the general issue that Yusuke and Ann were responding to it by setting up a photo-shoot.

"Okay, now Morgana, put your paw on his head," Ann coached, as Yusuke lined up the shot and Futaba squeaked in delight. Morgana reluctantly did, because it was Ann asking.

Joker looked up at them all quite calmly. His whiskers twitched once.

"It might wear off," Haru said. "Or perhaps we need to get far away from Shido's castle. That's how it wore off in the castle. Distance or time."

"That's actually a very good point," Makoto said thoughtfully. "That might work."

"I guess we should get some distance," Ryuji said, rubbing the back of his head, still bewildered. "Back to LeBlanc?"

"We're lucky Sojiro knows about what's going on," Haru said softly.

\---

Sojiro listened to the kids try to explain what was going on for about thirty seconds before firmly cutting them off.

"I am not going to understand this," he said. He'd honestly resigned himself to that as a state of being a long time ago, and it definitely applied in this case. "Just tell me what I need to do."

Haru and Makoto glanced at each other. They were currently the acting brain-cells of the group and hadn't completely hashed out a plan. They'd kind of been hoping that at some point on the way back to the coffee-shop Joker would just poof back into a high school student. That hadn't happened and now his tiny masked face was poking out of the Shujin tote that Morgana usually rode around in. They'd decided that a wandering cat was less noticeable than a wandering giant masked mouse.

"We're hoping it will wear off with time," Makoto told Sojiro as she set the tote and Joker down on the bar. "We just need to keep him safe until then."

"I'm getting him food!" Futaba announced, breezing past everyone on her way behind the bar and to the refrigerator. "Do we have cheese?"

"Yusuke!" Ann exclaimed. "Get a shot of him peeking out of the bag!"

"I think I'll close up early," Sojiro decided.

Joker peered curiously around. Probably the coffee shop looked different from his new perspective. He looked up at Sojiro.

Sojiro shook his head--the mild but thoughtful gaze of the mouse was familiar in a way that was easy to place. Sojiro still had no idea what was going on, but he recognized his kid.

"Well, what do you have to say for yourself?" he asked.

Joker squeaked.

\--

They were up in the attic. They'd all had curry for dinner--Joker ate the cheddar Sojiro sometimes used as a garnish. Futaba was crouched on the bed with him, currently pulling on his cheeks in the same way she sometimes did to Morgana. Joker bore it with more dignity.

Makoto had tried feeding all of the basic restorative medicines to Joker--stuff that worked on other status ailments like Nohar-M and Alert Capsules. It didn't seem to help. They had discovered that the white domino mask did come off, but would eventually vanish and appear on Joker's face again if taken far enough away. Ann had finally gotten enough adorable pictures to sate her appetite and was now decorating them with a phone app.

"You can't put those online," Makoto cautioned.

"I know," Ann said. "I'm just going to send them to the group."

"Yeeeessssss," said Futaba. "Joker mouse memes."

Makoto rubbed her head. "Does anyone know where that doctor lives? The one who sells us our medicine?"

"Just down the street," Futaba flopped back on the bed, looking upside down at Makoto. "Why?"

Joker also crept up to the edge of the bed, tilting his head quizzically.

"I'm going to talk to her tomorrow," said Makoto. "Her medicine helped with other ailments. She might be able to help with this."

"Okay good," said Ryuji. He was sitting cross-legged on the floor, watching Joker. He'd been weirdly subdued for the ride back and dinner. He kept casting worried glances at his best friend, who was currently a mouse.

"Should, uh, one of us stay with him?" Ryuji asked. "Like, is he going to be okay like this?"

"It's okay," said Morgana. "I'll watch out for him. As usual."

Ryuji cast Morgana a sideways glance. "But you're a cat."

Morgana bristled. "I'm NOT..."

"Yeah, yeah," Ryuji cut him off. "But you're a cat right NOW. So maybe we don't want to leave you alone with a mouse?"

Morgana bristled even more. "WHAT exactly are you implying?"

"You also don't have thumbs," Makoto pointed out, trying to deescalate the budding fight with logic. "And you can't call us if something happens. So Ryuji's right, we should probably leave someone with Joker in this state."

"Yeah!" Ryuji perked up a bit. "I am right! Again! Twice in one night."

"It's a record," Morgana muttered, fortunately softly enough the Ryuji didn't hear.

"We can trade off watching him until he gets better," Makoto decided, since that wouldn't put any one person under too much stress. "Who wants to take him tonight?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the longest chapter. The other chapters are from Joker's perspective, hanging out with all the PTs as a mouse.
> 
> Writing this makes me so happy.
> 
> I love his tiny paws.


	2. Ryuji

Joker was a mouse. But he wasn't really worried about it.

The Phantom Thieves had made amazing progress in Shido's palace--they had almost all of the letters of recommendation and December had barely started. He'd actually been planning to give the team a break before the final push. It just so happened he'd be spending that break as a mouse.

He thought Haru's theory that this would wear off in time was a likely one. And if it didn't, he had absolute faith that Makoto and Morgana would figure out how to fix it. They'd gone home together to brainstorm.

Joker went home with Ryuji for the first night he spent as a mouse. He was glad for it. Ryuji was clearly the most shaken by this turn of events. Hopefully, having Joker around, even in his transformed state, would be reassuring.

Joker spent the train ride to Ryuji's home in a Shujin tote bag that smelled faintly of shoes. It was actually kind of soothing, just being carried and not having to worry about anything. He felt like it was giving him a deeper understanding of how Morgana experienced life. The darkness and the rocking of the train actually put him to sleep for a while.

He woke up to a slight thump as his bag was put down on a table. He poked his head out of the tote, forcing the zipper open with his nose.

Metal shelves. Manga. Messy floor. The smell of snack-chips and sweat. Yep. This was Ryuji's room. 

He wriggled out of the bag and stood up on his hind legs. Ryuji was scratching the back of his head and looking down at him. All of the other Phantom Thieves seemed so tall now.

"So, uh," Ryuji started uncertainly. "You doing okay?"

Joker squeaked in what he hoped was an affirmative manner.

"Cool," said Ryuji. "Cool."

Ryuji looked around his own room as if seeing it for the first time.

"So we could, uh, I dunno. Play darts? Or use the Play Storm? I just got Destiny Dawn and it's pretty good. Got co-op."

It was nice how he was trying to pretend this was a normal hangout, but it was Thursday, so Joker knew he had homework from Mr. Inui. Joker nosed his way back into the tote and pulled out Ryuji's history textbook.

Ryuji scowled and scuffed the ground with a foot. "What are you, Makoto?"

Joker squeaked, which was his new version of "..."

Ryuji scoffed. "FINE."

As Ryuji settled down to reluctantly do some homework, Joker explored the space as a mouse. It was interesting getting used to moving in his new body. He had a much lower center of gravity, and having a tail was a completely new experience. He walked from one end of the room to the other. Moving on four legs was more natural. He experimented with walking on two legs. He felt like a toddler--about to fall over at every step.

He found himself weirdly drawn to the discarded crisp bags on the floor. They crinkled interestingly. He made a pile of them and crawled under them. It had the same soothing effect as being inside the tote bag. Dark enclosed spaces. He guessed that was a mouse thing.

"Hey, what're you doing?" Ryuji asked.

Joker squeaked. It was somewhat muffled by crisp wrappers.

"Okay, whatever."

Eventually, Ryuji finished the amount of homework he could bring himself to do in one sitting. Then they did a few normal hangout things. They tried to play darts, but even when Ryuji put him on top of the metal shelving unit so that he was at the right height, Joker just didn't have the upper arm strength to throw far enough. Using the PlayStorm was easier, even if he could only press one button at a time. They played a JRPG so that quick reactions didn't matter.

They ended the night by reading manga together. Ryuji had a new series he thought Joker would like. Joker found only being able to squeak actually didn't detract from his ability to comment on things too much--he just added exasperated or amused inflections to the squeaks. Ryuji seemed to get it. They were bros.

A peace settled over the room as they read together--Ryuji leaning against the bed, Joker with his book flat on the floor, turning each page with two paws.

"Hey man," Ryuji said, apropos of nothing. Then hesitated.

That hesitation probably meant he was talking about feelings. Joker gave an inquisitive squeak, prompting him to continue.

"I just...I'm glad you're cool, you know? I'm glad you're okay."

Joker felt his whiskers twitch and his tail curl. The motions felt like involuntary smiles. He hadn't been worried about the fact that he was a mouse, but obviously Ryuji had. It was hard to see extreme things happen to your friends, even when they were really weird extreme things. Maybe especially then. 

Joker scuttled over to Ryuji. He hesitated for a moment--trying to figure out the most-normal thing he could do in this situation. He settled for flopping against Ryuji's side. He reached up and patted Ryuji's arm with one paw. It was going to be okay.

"Yeah, I know man," Ryuji said, understanding what Joker meant almost word-for-word. "It's just...you know."

Joker did know. Worrying about his friends was an almost professional pastime for him. He remained slumped against Ryuji, watching him read his manga, until it was time to go to sleep.


	3. Ann

"So I was thinking: Hats."

Joker squeaked incredulously.

"Just let me show them to you," Ann said, holding up her hands to forestall any objections. "I know you'll love them."

It turned out that Ann had a surprisingly vast collection of tiny hats. And Joker was pretty sure these were just hers--that she hadn't responded to his transformation by going out on a shopping spree for tiny, mouse-sized hats. Though he wouldn't put that past her.

He examined a little witch's hat with a red rose and a sprig of taffeta. He squeaked again, curiously now.

"Oh I got that one from a convention," Ann said. "One of my magazines did a cosplay issue? And we all got a lot of REALLY fun clothes. I thought these were cute so I asked to keep them."

She took the small hat out of Joker's paws, and showed him how she could fasten it to the side of her head with subtle bobby-pins.

"But you don't need pins! It'll just fit you."

She put the little witch's hat on Joker's head. It did fit. He adjusted it with his paws for comfort.

"Cuuuuute!" Ann exclaimed. "I love it when you use your little paws to do things!"

Joker squeaked dryly. It wasn't like he had another option.

"Here, try this one," Ann said, reaching over for another hat. "It'll go with your mask."

This hat was a little top-hat: pale white with feathers. Joker put it on at a jaunty angle. Ann clapped.

"Perfect!" she exclaimed. "You're a natural. I should try to get you a modeling gig!"

Joker squeaked cautiously.

"I knoooow," Ann sighed. "We can't let anyone know about the metaverse and you being a mouse and stuff."

She took out her phone.

"But I will send pictures to Futaba."

Joker acquiesced to that.


	4. Makoto

Mouse-Joker was spending this evening with Makoto.

Because of this, Joker got an update on how the search for a cure was going. Makoto had made contact with Doctor Takemi. Joker was grateful he'd deepened his relationship with the doctor to the point where she knew about the Phantom Thieves, because that meant Makoto could be frank with her about the mouse-problem.

And apparently Takemi had an idea about how to solve it. Especially after she'd examined the Hiranya that Makoto had brought to her--hoping that almost universal status ailment curative might hold the key to reversing Joker's condition.

But that had all happened earlier. It was night now. Makoto was asleep. Joker had crept into the Niijima living room to retrieve the rest of the provolone which he had nibbled on for dinner. Apparently, a nibble wasn't quite enough to get you through the night. He was still getting used to the needs of his new body.

While he was climbing out of the refrigerator with a tupperware of cheese, Sae Niijima arrived at home.

Joker scrambled for cover as the front door opened. He made it under the dining room table just as the lights flickered on.

He listened to the bump-thump of a large person moving around. No, a normal sized person. HE was just tiny. He scampered backwards as one of the dining room chairs moved and Sae sat down with a sigh.

Sae didn't know about his situation--Makoto had decided that, though her sister knew about the Metaverse and would certainly be amenable to helping, the absurdity of the situation would be stressful. The Nijimas were a sensible folk, and Makoto knew that the raw absurdity of one of her friends transforming into a mouse would upset Sae. It had upset Makoto. And since there was nothing Sae could do to help, Makoto deemed it best to keep her sister in the dark about this one particularly ludicrous chapter in the story of the Phantom Thieves.

If Joker had just stayed in Makoto's room all night, that wouldn't have been a problem. But his ill-timed cheese run meant that he was now in danger of giving Sae Nijima a nasty shock. And he owed the prosecutor quite a bit. He'd rather not upset her. So he'd have to sneak back to Makoto's room.

Well. He could do that. After all. He was a Phantom Thief.

MISSION START.

Joker activated Thief Sight and took in his options.

Few hiding spots in the kitchen. At least not on the ground level.

The familiar gleam of a grappling hook target sparkled from the top of the refrigerator. But if he went for that, Sae would see him. He'd need a distraction.

He hefted the tupperware of cheese and tossed it across the room. It clattered loudly on the living room floor.

Sae made a noise of wordless curiosity, shifting in her chair. For a moment, Joker worried she wouldn't move, but then the chair slid back and he saw her stepping away.

Joker dashed out from under the table and shot his grappling hook up into the air.

He flew up, more flying squirrel than mouse for a moment, and landed on top of the refrigerator. He scampered quickly across the upper cupboards, using flower vases and old coffee cans as cover.

Sae had found the tupperware of cheese. She was scanning the room, trying to figure out where it had fallen from.

As she glanced the other way, Joker somersaulted down to the counter-top, and then the floor, and made a dash for a living room chair. He ducked into hiding just as Sae turned to look his way.

From there, it was a simple matter of dashing from hiding place to hiding place, and then he could slip through Makoto's slightly open bedroom door.

As he used his tail to pull the door shut behind him, he heard Sae say softly:

"It was probably nothing."


	5. Yusuke

Seeing Yusuke's room in-person (in-mouse-son?) made Joker resolve to pay more attention to how much Yusuke was getting to eat. Growing your own food, and turning off appliances to save energy was all well and good, but those details and all of the elements of the bare room, decorated only with canvas and art supplies, combined to give an impression of poverty that didn't sit well with Joker.

After all. There was over a million yen in the Phantom Thieves' coffers. They could invest a little of that in one of their members not going hungry. No matter how little he seemed to care about petty, non-artistic details like his own survival.

But that was a mission for non-mouse Joker. For now he would settle for keeping Yusuke company while he painted.

And Yusuke did go immediately from the door to what was clearly his latest project--another attempt at capturing Ann. This attempt was done in an impressionist style--with broad brush-strokes and watery colors that flowed into each other.

Yusuke refreshed his paints, selected a brush and went immediately to work. He probably forgot he had a guest the moment he walked in the door, so set in his habits. Joker didn't mind. He enjoyed just being in quiet company with his friends. Even when they were clearly completely unconscious of his presence.

Eventually, afternoon dragged on into evening. Joker started to get hungry, which meant Yusuke should also be getting hungry, though he'd never be aware of it. Joker decided to remind him.

Joker found a packet of old ramen in the refrigerator (Why was it in the refrigerator? Endless questions.) and hunted around in a bowl of fruit that was clearly intended as a still-life subject, discovering two apples that had not gone bad. Between that and the slice of swiss cheese Makoto had left him with (Makoto was also concerned that Yusuke would forget about food), Joker felt he had the makings of dinner.

Joker had to sneak out to the common room to boil water for the ramen, but after his adventure in the Nijima household, he felt equal to that challenge. The hardest part was walking back to Yusuke's dorm room with the mug of hot water--it was heavy enough that he had to carry it with both paws. 

When he got back he put the ramen in the hot water to soften, poured in the spices at the proper time, and then wafted it under Yusuke's nose until he got the artist's attention.

"What?" Yusuke asked, blinking.

Joker squeaked and held up the mug of ramen.

"Oh." It took Yusuke another moment to entirely emerge from his artistic trance. When he did, his face fell.

"My apologies, my friend. In my preoccupation with my work, I entirely forgot about the demands of the body."

Joker squeaked understandingly.

They ate a picnic dinner on the dorm room floor. Joker nibbled at cheese and apple and found it quite satisfying. With Yusuke's help he tried some of the ramen, but found it less appealing. Nowadays, he preferred food he could nibble on.

Yusuke was more sociable after dinner, apparently feeling contrite for having completely forgotten about Joker's existence for three hours. He shared some of his portfolio pieces, which Joker examined with interest, and invited Joker to attempt composition himself.

"Perhaps your transformation hides in it some opportunity," Yusuke suggested. "Art is enhanced by exploring different perspectives. Being inspired by them, and reflecting their nuance through your medium."

Joker did have a new perspective. It was much lower to the ground. He wasn't sure he was inspired by it, but he was game to try to do an art.

It turned out that holding a brush was tricky. Not having thumbs made everything weird. Yusuke quickly suggested an alternative.

At the end of the evening, Joker was fairly pleased with the collage of pawprints he had created, all in red and black. It looked, if you let your eyes unfocus a bit, vaguely like Arsène's hat.


	6. Haru

The cups from Haru's teaset were delicate and light enough that Joker could lift them with one paw. He expected that was an intentional detail. Haru was considerate like that.

"We have camebert, brie, and sharp cheddar over here," she said, browsing over the silver snack tray. "Oh, this stilton is very good. May I serve you some?"

Joker squeaked agreeably. Haru cut slender slices of cheese for Joker and then herself.

"I've been thinking about how we might converse," she said. "You're very expressive with your squeaking, but I thought of something that might be more precise. Perhaps, squeak twice for yes and once for no?"

Joker squeaked twice. Haru clapped her hands.

"Wonderful. Now I was wondering, how are you feeling? Or, I suppose I should ask, are you feeling all right? I imagine this situation rather stressful."

Joker considered this. He was actually, he realized, rather enjoying himself. One of the things he liked most in his life was spending time with his friends, and he'd gotten to do that every night for the last four days. And in light of their care, the difficulties of being a mouse were interesting challenges rather than true hardships.

However, he didn't like how stressed Makoto was becoming. And the deadline of their mission was starting to loom in his mind. He waved his tail uncertainly back and forth and settled on one-and-a-half squeaks.

"That's very clever of you to find a third option for an answer." Haru smiled. "I suppose it is a complicated question. Anything to do with feelings is."

Joker squeaked twice. Yes.

"Is there anything I can do to make your stay more comfortable?"

Joker lifted up the stilton cheese he was nibbling on. He was extremely comfortable. Haru was a good host.

Then he pointed at Haru with his tail.

"Me?" Haru smiled. "Oh, I'm fine. I'm doing rather well, considering everything." She sipped her tea. "It was such a relief to end my engagement to Sugimura, and it's wonderful to have a dream to work towards."

She sipped her tea again, then put the cup down in its saucer. She placed it so gently, there was no clack of porcelain to mark the act. Then she frowned down at her tea.

"I feel...well actually, I feel a bit too happy."

Joker tilted his head quizzically to one side.

"I should be mourning my father more, shouldn't I?" she asked. "I should be more upset that he's gone."

Joker wasn't sure what to say to that. It wasn't his, or anyone's, place to pass judgment on Haru's feelings. He wasn't sure how to express that in squeaks. He settled for watching her, leaning forward, ears tilted up attentively. Listening was one of his favorite ways to provide support, and he could still do that.

"I am sad that he's gone," Haru continued eventually. "But...I feel like I'm mourning potential. What could have been between us. Instead of what was. And that's a little different from actually losing someone."

Haru sighed. "I feel like I actually lost him quite a long time ago."

Then she lapsed into silence, still looking down at her teacup, idly touching the edge of the delicate saucer. Some people could divine the future in tea leaves. Haru was only contemplating the past.

Joker let time pass to see if there was anything else that needed to be said. He couldn't say anything supportive, which frustrated him. So he took action instead. He very carefully climbed up onto the table. He wove his way between the teacups and the sugar pot, around the cheese tray, over to Haru's side.

He reached down and took up Haru's hand, patting it gently with one tiny paw.

Haru looked like she was going to laugh for a moment, but then her face instead settled into a grateful smile. She moved so that Joker held her fingertips, which were better sized for his paws, and it was almost like they were clasping hands.

"Thank you," she said. "In any form, you're such a good friend."

Joker squeaked twice, pointed at Haru with his tail, and clasped her fingertips warmly.


	7. Futaba

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short one this time. But important.

Sojiro walked down the hall to say goodnight to Futaba.

It had been a weird evening. It was apparently Futaba's turn to take care of Akira, who was still, for reasons Sojiro didn't and would never understand, some kind of giant mouse.

But that mouse was definitely the quiet, thoughtful kid that he'd taken in almost a year ago, so the weirdest thing was how it DIDN'T really feel weird to have dinner and watch evening television with a mouse. It just felt kind of natural. Expected.

Another strange thing--Futaba's lights were out. That usually didn't happen until well past midnight. His adopted daughter was a night owl. Sojiro peered through the open door.

Futaba was splayed over her futon, headphones still over her ears, taking up space as if intentionally making up for her small size.

Clutched in one of her arms like a teddy-bear was a large mouse with a white domino mask.

He and Sojiro exchanged a glance.

The mouse's whiskers twitched.

"Goodnight," Sojiro said softly.

The mouse's whiskers twitched again. Futaba muttered in her sleep and squeezed him tighter.

Sojiro gently closed the door and went to the kitchen to do dishes.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's the end!
> 
> Unless there's a squeak-uel. :D
> 
> If you like this, I do other writing stuff at [my website.](http://abigailcorfman.com/)
> 
> Cheers!

They were back in the attic above LeBlanc. Everyone was in their usual places around the fold-out table, just like when this room had been their hideout. Joker was in his usual spot at the head of the table. Joker was also still a mouse.

It was two weeks to the deadline, and the Phantom Thieves were getting restless. Makoto didn't want to go back to the Palace without Joker, but if this didn't work...

She shook her head. This would work. The cognitive world functioned partially based on your expectations, so she just kept thinking that: This would work.

"This will work," she said out loud, putting a small canister of blue balm on the table.

"Cool," said Ryuji. "What is it?"

"It's the chemical composition of Hiranya synthesized like Relax Gel," Makoto explained. "This 'mouse' effect is most similar to the ailment where we're paralyzed with fear, since it prevents us from doing anything but running away. The hope is that by synthesizing a more powerful substance with the process we use to cure that fear response, we can go further and cure this."

Of course that wasn't actually how medicine worked. At all. And Makoto knew that, and her awareness of that had led to a long conversation with Takemi where the doctor had explained about the placebo effect: a mental phenomenon which would naturally be extremely powerful in the Metaverse. It turned out that almost all of what she gave Joker was elaborately packaged sugar pills. Which was probably a lot more responsible of her than giving teenagers hospital-grade medicine. The prices, Takemi justified, were part of what made the placebos effective. People believed that value followed cost.

Makoto was concerned that knowing the secret meant that none of their medicine would work on her anymore. But that was a problem for another day. For now, she had to convince everyone else that this would work. Which was why she had used the word 'synthesize' twice in her explanation.

"So we just use it like Relax Gel?" Ann asked, leaning over to open the canister. The stuff inside was bright blue and smelled like medicine. That was also an important factor, according to Takemi.

"That's the idea," said Makoto.

Futaba reached forward, scraping a goopy dollop of blue onto her fingers.

"Say goodbye, mouse-Joker," she said, smearing it on his head.

There was a noise like a soft explosion and a puff of powdery smoke filled the room. Everyone was suddenly coughing and waving at the air, trying to clear the smoke so that they could see what had happened.

"Goodbye, mouse-Joker," Akira said amiably.

Futaba squeaked, an almost pitch perfect imitation of the noises Joker had recently been making, and tackled him with a hug.

"Yeah!" yelled Ryuji, jumping up and knocking over his chair in triumphant excitement.

"Thank god," Makoto whispered, sinking back into her seat.

The next few minutes were a tumult of hugs and exclamations and purring. The usual for a Phantom Thief reunion.

"I'll miss how you looked in tiny hats," Ann said wistfully.

"You have plenty of pictures," Akira reminded her.

Ann sighed. "Yeah but it's not the same."

"We can always go back to Shido's palace," Haru suggested with a slight smile. "Then we can all be mice."

"But not for much longer!" Morgana said, reminding them of their goal.

"Yeah!" said Ryuji. "Let's sink that ship!"

The conversation progressed naturally to plans for that night's infiltration. Places they hadn't searched yet. Concerns about the mysterious Cleaner. Reviewing the shadows they'd encountered so far, and what the common weaknesses were, and by that note who should be in the front line of combat.

Akira let himself sink back into his normal role--listening, taking in everyone's perspectives, and synthesizing them into decisions. He honestly didn't feel that much different after the experience he'd been though. He'd still been with his friends. They'd still been working together to move forward. The most difficult part had been not being able to talk, and he didn't do too much of that anyway.

He did, perhaps, feel a slight craving for stilton.

That was easy enough to fix.


End file.
